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Saturday 3 March 2012

Autism Island

I feel like my mini-man lives on his own little island some days, Autism Island. I know he is high functioning and for this I am grateful, but sometimes I wish I know what was going on in his world. I feel some days as if I cannot reach him and he is lost to me.
I know my wonderful loving smart boy is in there and wants to come out I just think he doesn't know how and is scared. I try to make the world not so scary but it is hard and I don't know what to do that will make this land we live in a friendlier place. I wonder if I should try and make the trip to Autism Island to bring him here if he cannot cope with the land the rest of the world lives in or if I should let him live on Autism Island, at least until he finds his own way here.
Today is one of the days he is so lost on Autism Island I can not do anything to start to bring him back. Right now his is playing Abby's Flying Fairy School and nothing I have tried has brought him off that computer. I tried to play his preferred game, set up a Thomas the train track, food bribes, and just saying no more and taking the computer away, but the fit that followed could have resulted in major injury so I had to let him back, (I tried to calm him down for 20 mins before giving in) he as self injuring at the time.
While I have come to peace most of the time on what is going on with him I still struggle when I want to interact with him or even just try and not have him on a screen all day.
Right now I just feel like I am the one adrift looking for a land for me and my family where we all can be happy and live together. I wonder if we need something or some one else to help us find this land. I wonder about a puppy, mini-man likes dogs that are smaller then him and I know that dogs have been taught to work with autistic kids in different ways. I wonder if one could help us and bring my family all together once more, I need to do something and get my son and my family back. His visits to the Autistic Island is tearing us apart.

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