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Sunday 7 August 2011

Love

As my people on Google+ know I sometimes ask a question of the week well last weeks was what made you fall in love with your significant other. I had asked myself this many times over the years I have been with DH. The thing is I never really had an answer that I liked for that question. The one I kept coming back to was because he is always there. I wondered what others would say and the answer I got was right along the same lines to quote it here " There are a lot of reasons I love Doug, not least of which is the shared experience of 8 years together as best friends. I've always been able to tell him anything and to rely on him, even when we were broken up and angry and barely speaking. But one of the things that makes me fall more in love with him again and again is the way he can always make me feel like the most important person in the world, like he's always happy to see me and be with me even when I'm at my worst. It doesn't take much, just a kind word or affectionate smile, but it's not something most people can manage. I really appreciate those little gestures he's so good at taking the time to do." I under stand this feeling but as time has wore on I am wondering if this is what one needs in a relationship.
Mine has become very routine and I miss the spontaneity of a new relationship. Maybe it is because I do crave change and adventure and adventure is hard to come by when you have children. I mean I even try to take day trips so I have change on a regular basis.
Possible TMI warning, sex is starting to become boring and not as fun. This is just wrong but it is the way things are. I need something different in some part of my life and that should be the easiest part to find it. But I will not go into it cause I am sure not every one wants to hear about it. 
The thing is this question has brought to me what I do not like about my other half. The thing is it is the fact he wants to plan every thing. I hate planning everything I like just doing. I also feel alone because the computer often wins over me. This is the hardest part. 
I really am not sure where this is leading more a reflection on the marriage I am in, I thought that would happen with this post so I am going to let it go and let others take what they want from it. 
I just want to say I do love my husband and plan to stay with him I am just trying to find what else I am missing.

1 comment:

  1. (This is Stephanie.)

    Try doing something to break up the routine? Maybe figure out a time in his schedule when he can take time away, arrange a sitter, and surprise him at work (or wherever) for a date? Or schedule a date night with him ahead of time. Tell him to keep his plans to himself and surprise you with a date? :D Maybe it doesn't have to actually be in your relationship, you could take on some new exciting hobby for yourself and get the husband to take the kids while you do it, or even just time to yourself to do whatever you want to do, no errands.

    I hope you find something that fills that need for spontaneity and adventure, whatever it is. BTW, the truest and (imo) sweetest explanation of love I've ever heard, packaged in an adorable and hilarious song:

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Gaid72fqzNE

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